Thursday, April 21, 2011

The Thing about Kids is You Have to Raise Them

I love babies, and I enjoy being around them.  But I have never looked at a baby as just a baby.  When I see a baby, I see a human being who will become a child, a teenager, and eventually an adult.  I never went through a phase as a teenager where I wanted to get pregnant.  I wasn't in a hurry to have kids.  And this is because I saw a baby as a human being that you are responsible for for the duration of your and their life.  I'm not saying any of this to seem like I'm just "oh so smart." Believe me, I'm not.  That's just part of the way my brain operates.

And let me mention that just because I see a child as a responsibility does not mean that I do not believe that children are wonderful blessings.  I'm saying all of this to preface something I read about tonight.

I have been loaned this fabulous pregnancy book by my "Aunt Patti." :) It's called The Pregnancy Countdown Book.  
I LOVE IT! It counts down pregnancy by the day.  Each day has a page of random thoughts, comments from mothers, jokes, etc. relevant to the stage of pregnancy you are in.  I have a hard time not reading ahead because I enjoy it so much.

Well, I just had to share tonight's reading on here.  It deals with, you guessed it, parenting.  When you are expecting a child, it's pretty much impossible NOT to think about how you will raise him/her.  You may have a plan NOT to be like your parents or to be just like them.  And, of course, we all have witnessed people who have to parent and discipline their children in public.  I, for one, would say that I would be being dishonest if I didn't admit I form my own opinions about people's parenting techniques when I see them.

But this page tonight really brought out some important things that I think we all should remember.  I am going to write it down exactly as it appeared on the page.

"At This Point
I'm not going to be like that!
No doubt you're noticing mothers with their children a whole lot more than you did before.  You probably already have some ideas of how you'll parent differently.  For example, your child will never:
  • have a tantrum in a grocery store (only brats do that)
  • eat cookies in the grocery store (she will request carrot sticks)
  • eat sugar or drink juice (she will request water or milk)
  • get hooked on a binky (she will be a secure child)
You will also never in a million years tell your child, "If you don't get back in this grocery cart, I'm leaving.  Okay, here I go.  Okay, I mean it.  See my keys are out.  I'm shaking them. Here I go...."

What real moms think of your plan
     Good luck!

Consider staying silent
"If I were you, I would keep my big child-rearing plans to myself--especially in front of mothers with young children.  Maybe you will be the one mother in a million who continues to make her own organic baby food past the third batch and really won't use lollipops as a child-rearing tool.  But then again, you haven't been shopping with a young child yet."
-Lisa, mom to Harris and Brian"

It's true we (or I if I am alone in this) will see other people with their children and think "they really ought to...." But what do I know? I haven't had a child and what mother doesn't get physically and mentally exhausted after handling a small child all day? Who hasn't thrown in the towel after seeming to have tried everything?  I haven't had children, but I have been a nanny and it does wear you out.  Some days you just want to offer the child a million dollars just to be quiet...just to have some peace.  And that's why THEY and WE are all human and EVERYONE Everyone learns as they go.  

So hats off to the moms out there working hard to raise their children no matter what strategies they've tried.

1 comment:

  1. Yep, parenting is one of those jobs that you pretty much go into with little to no experience. Liking babies and being a nanny or around young children is a big plus though. We all kind of muddle through. As I heard on James Dobson yesterday, there will be days when you won't feel all "ooie-gooie" about your children and that's ok. Just remember, you and Lee are the BEST parents Gordon Lee will have because God picked you to be his mom ann dad.